One of the questions I'm asked most often as a marriage celebrant is:

"How can we include our children in the ceremony?"

My answer is always the same...

Keep it simple.

Whether your children are toddlers, teenagers or somewhere in between, including them in your wedding can create some of the most heartfelt moments of the day. But the key is to choose something that suits their personality, not the expectations of everyone else.

Remember, while you're focused on marrying the love of your life, your little people are experiencing a day that's exciting, emotional and often completely overwhelming.

There are new faces everywhere, beautiful clothes they aren't used to wearing, lots of waiting around and plenty of curious eyes watching them.

Even the most confident child can decide at the last minute that they'd rather cling to Mum's leg than walk down the aisle... and that's perfectly okay.

Little Children Don't Read the Run Sheet

I've conducted enough weddings to know one thing for certain...

Children are wonderfully unpredictable.

And honestly, that's part of their charm.

If your three-year-old decides halfway down the aisle that they'd rather wave to Grandma, stop to pick up a leaf or run back for a cuddle, don't panic.

Those unscripted moments often become everyone's favourite memory.

Your guests won't be judging.

They'll be smiling.

Wedding Roles Children Love

If your children would like to be involved, there are so many lovely ways to include them.

They could be:

• Flower girls or page boys.
• Ring bearers.
• Bubble blowers.
• Petal throwers.
• Sign carriers with a fun or heartfelt message.
• Helpers during a unity ceremony.
• Walking down the aisle with Mum, Dad or another family member.
• Standing with you throughout the ceremony.
• Joining you for family photographs before heading off to enjoy the celebration.

The best role is always the one that feels natural for them.

My Biggest Ring Bearer Tip

If there's one piece of advice I give every couple...

Don't give children the real wedding rings.

Yes, they look adorable carrying them.

No, it's not worth the risk!

Instead, attach replica rings to the cushion or ring box for the photographs, and keep the real rings safely with your best man, maid of honour or another trusted adult until it's time for the exchange.

I've never met a four-year-old who intentionally wanted to lose a wedding ring...

...but I have met plenty who were suddenly distracted by butterflies, puppies or something far more exciting than jewellery!

What About Teenagers?

Teenagers often appreciate being given a meaningful role that reflects their age.

They might:

• Escort a parent down the aisle.
• Read a favourite poem or reading.
• Witness the signing of the marriage certificates.
• Help welcome guests.
• Play live music if they're talented musicians.
• Simply stand proudly beside you during the ceremony.

Giving older children an important role can be a wonderful way of recognising the place they already hold within your family.

Blending Two Families

Some of the most moving ceremonies I've conducted have involved children from previous relationships.

A wedding isn't just bringing two people together.

Sometimes it's the beginning of a brand-new family.

Whether it's including the children in your entrance, acknowledging them during the ceremony or sharing a family hug after your vows, these thoughtful moments can become some of the most emotional memories of the day.

The Best Weddings Leave Room for Real Life

One of the reasons I love celebrating family-focused weddings is because they feel real.

They aren't about perfection.

They're about love.

They're about laughter.

They're about creating memories that genuinely reflect your family.

So if you're wondering whether your children should be included in your ceremony, my answer is almost always...

Absolutely.

We'll simply find a way that suits them, keeps the day relaxed and creates memories you'll treasure forever.

Because some of the most beautiful moments in a wedding are the ones nobody planned.

Planning a Family-Friendly Wedding?

As a marriage celebrant based in North East Victoria, I've had the privilege of officiating hundreds of weddings where children have played an important part in the ceremony.

Whether you're planning your first family celebration or bringing two families together, I'd love to help create a ceremony that's relaxed, personal and full of the moments that matter most.

Cheryl's Wedding Tip

Don't measure success by whether your children do everything perfectly.

If they giggle, wave to Nan, forget where they're meant to stand or decide they'd rather cuddle Mum halfway through the ceremony, embrace it.

Those perfectly imperfect moments are often the ones everyone remembers most fondly